arch-bi'sho(pp)ing

ELLEN: Hello?

RICH: Hey, it's Rich. What's goin' on?

ELLEN: Hey Rich, how are ya? Can you hold on just a sec?

RICH: Sure.

ELLEN: Thanks.

(...81 seconds of silence...)

ELLEN: Rich, sorry.

RICH: No problem.

ELLEN: The office whole thing is a pain now.

RICH: I hear ya, it's hectic here too. (laughs)

ELLEN: Listen, um, I just wanted to circle back with you, um... about the other night. I know you guys kinda had a few folks over and whatever. Um... and this is something that's really become upsetting to me, 'cause I, I don't like to be in the position of, you know having to call at... (sigh) basically three o'clock in the morning. I was woken up by all the screamin' goin' on in your apartment.

RICH: OK...?

ELLEN: ...the night before, a work night. And, Rich, I'm sorry but to me that is completely unacceptable. And I tried to call... but you didn't pick up the phone... I heard what was said... about me, I find it very insulting (laughs) ...the yelling, I mean I can hear EVERYTHING and so, you have to understand that I don't call you all the time there's a lot that I just, LIVE WITH.

RICH: Right.

ELLEN: You know? But when you guys are drunk... and you're whoopin' it up over there, it affects ME and my LIFE and my SLEEP... and I'm... I'm TIRED of it. I really am tired of it. (laughs) So... I don't know what the solution is because I'm sure you're as tired of it, also, and I'm sure you don't like to get calls, um... but I, I just find you know... a lot of the stuff... offensive (laughs) and I just, you know, I, I just... really don't intend to put up with, especially with three o'clock in the morning wake up issues.

RICH: I understand that, I mean... I was uh...

ELLEN: So, you have to know that, if this happens again I'm not gonna be makin' phone calls anymore. I'm just, I'm gonna take other courses of action at this point. So you guys either need to, be aware, of what you're doin, or I, I have to address it differently... because I find it very upsetting and insulting... if you, you know, don't even pick up the phone. So, you know, whatever is motivating that, I, I don't know. But it's as unpleasant for me, as it is for you. And, you know I, I just wanna have the courtesy to at least let you know how I feel about it so that you know, I mean if you have an opinion or you have something else why I have... you have always been really nice and, you know, supportive and cooperative but for whatever reason that has changed, over the last few months I mean I think the last couple times it has been extremely loud no one picks up the phone or someone says you're not there and you're there 'cause I can here ya, so, (sighs) you know, that kind of horsin' around... you know... I, I ... owner to owner, I mean, PLEASE, have sympathy (laughs) for the fact that my quality of life is a little different than yours, in, in terms of the way i live it, it's a little different than yours. You know?

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: And... I'm, if you guys wanna have parties or whatever and you send me an e-mail, I don't think I've ever bothered you when you've had a big party. I mean, NEVER. Because... that's, you know you're gonna do that and whatever and thanks for havin' you know, just thanks for givin' me a heads up...

RICH: Right.

ELLEN: ...because then i make other plans. You know?

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: This kinda stuff, has gotta stop. You know? So... I, ya know, I don't know how you feel about it but I, I'm just really, I'm to the point that I won't bother you with phone calls and I'll react a different way. And...

RICH: Yeah I mean I apologize, I'm not going to give you excuses, I think it's stuff I have to deal with with people so...

ELLEN: Yeah... just... I, I just don't like bein' insulted and having to hear it through my walls.

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: (laughs) You know, and I am looking into things to try to make it better on my side I mean I've done research, my father's gonna fly up and help me, fix it, but until that happens... I mean I shouldn't even have to do that, frankly... but, you know, I... (sigh) I'm a nice person, I'm a reasonable person, but I'm 10 years older than ya man, I, ya know, I'm not up at three o'clock in the mornin' on a work night.

RICH: Right.

ELLEN: So... and I'm not up that time on a friday night half the time, I'm not up that time on a saturday night you know? I just, I'm older than you, I sleep, and this is what happens... but...

RICH: I mean to be honest I don't know what you heard or what was said, I mean...

ELLEN: Yeah...

RICH: It's stuff I have to uh...

ELLEN: "I don't fucking care what she thinks" - you know...

RICH: Yeah.

ELLEN: ...this I've heard more than once and, you know, I've heard the booger conversation about "everybody picks their nose" and "they like it half the time" and you know... (sighs) the last one, i hear about the black nipples and the, and, you know, I mean...

RICH: k, I don't even... O-K?

ELLEN: You know, Rich, honestly. I, it's... it's too much. And I don't even know if you guys remember because you've been drinking the whole time. You know? And I have to live with it and it's not, it's not right.

RICH: Well I don't think I was awake to be honest when, when the phone rang but... um...

ELLEN: ...I, I don't know, I mean I, I can't

RICH: You know, like I said I'm not, I don't wanna make excuses about anything so

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: I mean I, I have to talk to... you know, Nick, um...

ELLEN: ...and I think he's a nice guy, I mean he's always been nice one-on-one but his REAL opinion of the situation is different, you know? And that's fine if you can keep it to yourself but I also don't wanna hear that through the wall, you know? So... you don't have to like me... (laughs) ...you know? I don't have to like you guys, but I DO. You've always been really nice, and really cooperative, and out of courtesy I'd just let you know how absolutely enraged I am about the whole situation. And, you know, I'd like to remedy it with you but honestly at this point, I just, next time it happens, you know, that's it. I'm taking different recourses, and I don't know if you wanna have that kind of issue on your hands but that's what's gonna happen alri...?

RICH: I mean I'm not really sure what you mean by that because I'm not sure what, you know, recourse is available, you know...

ELLEN: Well, there's cops. I mean, they come. They handle noise issues. You know?

RICH: Yeah...

ELLEN: I mean, and honestly they can just come to my apartment. I mean they don't even have to knock on your door. They can witness it from my apartment. Other people have witnessed it from my apartment as well. So, this is, you know...

RICH: I, I mean, listen, I understand what you're saying. There's um... certainly the other night was, was not acceptable, um... but I mean in general there's not much else we can do other than, um... I mean I'm not making excuses for the other night, there were, that, that was unacceptable, I agree with that...

ELLEN: Right.

RICH: ...but I mean just in general there's not much we can do about, you know, the building issues, you can hear things so...

ELLEN: Yeah, no, and I, that's what I say, I mean I understand that there's just basic issues which everyone has, you know, everyone has...

RICH: I mean it sounds like there's elephants above me but you know i just deal with it so...

ELLEN: Exactly, and that's what I want you to understand is that I do deal with that stuff, I really do I mean I don't... it's not that every time I hear one thing I call you up, that's not the case...

RICH: I understand that.

ELLEN: ...you know, it, it's really not the case, I hear you guys every single day and that's just the fact of being in the condo, you know, and that's NOT your fault, that's the way the building's built you know? But unfortunately if I can hear just the basic conversations when you're sittin' on the couch when you guys get drunk and loud I can hear it across my WHOLE apartment, you know?

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: And that to me is unacceptable at those hours you know? It just is 'cause I can't sleep you know? THAT, that's the issue, so, I don't know, I mean, I just needed to talk to you about it, because like I said you've always been really cooperative and... you know... I just... dunno what's going on lately but it, it's startin' to really make me angry (LAUGHS) as you can tell so, I, you know, if there's something that you wanna try and work out then I'm more than, you know, willing but...

RICH: Well, I mean, I don't think there's anything to work out I think I...

ELLEN: If you're not going to pick up the phone I don't know what else I can do.

RICH: Well, like I said, if I had realized the phone was ringing I would have picked it up, i don't know why anyone else didn't...

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: ...so...

ELLEN: (sighs) but that's it... so... I just really wanted to talk to you about it because I'm never home at night to catch you and, you know, if you guys ever wanna have a perspective of what it's like then I'm more than willing, I think I've said on a couple of occasions...

RICH: No it's not like I, (laughs) I don't think that... just based on the fact of what I can hear, it, I understand, so... I mean I have to, I just have to talk to people.

ELLEN: Yeah, I know, alright...

RICH: Alright?

ELLEN: Well thanks for lettin' me give you my... (LAUGHS) my rant, it really does upset me though, and I, I really don't like to hear certain things either so, you know.

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: ...um... so, anyway... but uh... yeah, let me know, if you want me to call, if you want that to be the process and we both agree to that, then, you know, fine, I'm more than happy to work within that but otherwise I don't have a choice, I have to call the cops.

RICH: No, I know, but listen I think it generally works fine I don't... I mean unless there's a lot of times you don't say anything I don't think it's...

ELLEN: uh, er, there... that, that's the thing, there are a lot of times I don't say anything because I don't want to call you all the time, you know?

RICH: ...and it depends what time that is, I mean...

ELLEN: Exactly.

RICH: You know, if, if we're just being normal, you know, and that's stuff you can hear there's not much I can say about that...

ELLEN: Agreed.

RICH: At... reasonable hours...

ELLEN: I exactly agree and that's why I DON'T say anything about it, you know? Because I don't think...

RICH: So that obviously is affecting the other times that, when it is a problem, so...

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: The best I can say is, I just need to talk to people who were involved. I'm not saying I was completely innocent but... there's ways that I can, I can try to minimize, you know... the disturbance, so...

ELLEN: I just, I don't want it to be an upsetting situation for you, or for me, at this point, you know? I'm really not a fan of alternative methods, to be honest with you, I'd rather just be able to call and get along and work through it that way I mean that's what I would rather do...

RICH: Yeah, no...

ELLEN: You've always been...

RICH: I hear ya. I think this last time, I... I noticed that you had called, I asked the people who were there also you know, why no one answered the phone, they didn't, I don't know why...

ELLEN: Well that's 'cause Nick HATES me, basically...

RICH: Eh, I don't think that's...

ELLEN: Well, that that's what's comin' out of his mouth so he has absolutely zero respect so...

RICH: ...well, that's what you hear, I mean, Nick is...

ELLEN: That's FINE. I, I don't, I don't care, but really.

RICH: No obviously.

ELLEN: He's not the owner of the place...

RICH: It, eh, yeah, no...

ELLEN: ...you are, and that's...

RICH: What it comes down to is I need to have a talk with him and other people that, that come over, I mean I, I'm not saying I'm innocent and, let it go on, but I also kind of passed out before they did so...

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: (laughs)

ELLEN: And listen, man, I mean, I have been in your shoes, don't forget that. It's not that I don't understand what's happening. I mean you're havin' a few drinks, you're hangin' out with friends, you know? It, it's whatever, I mean, we all had done that... you know what I mean?

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: It's just, I'm in a different place right now and I sleep early and you know if I was still in the same mode it would probably not be an issue at all, but unfortunately...

RICH: Yeah, well, I can tell you certain things are changing, at least...

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: That uh, I, I'll have to e-mail you about, but,

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: Um, I don't know, I, listen let, let me talk to...

ELLEN: Yeah, no I.

RICH: ...people and try to figure out what we can do, I mean obviously we don't, or I don't

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: Need to be disturbed and I, I mean we'll just have to work around it.

ELLEN: What happens with me when I get to this point I mean I just don't want to get into a situation where I'm irrationally reacting because I'm so upset about the situation and what's been going on, you know.

RICH: Right.

ELLEN: So, I'd rather just have a one-on-one with you let you know where I stand and give you a chance to I mean, agree, disagree, whatever, do what you wanna do, and, we'll work...

RICH: Yeah, I mean to the extent that things are like the other night, I agree with you, to the extent that it's before ten or eleven on any day I, I don't know... again, it's just (sighs)...

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: ...it's gray area, I, I don't, at those times it's, I don't know what to tell you.

ELLEN: Yeah, I know.

RICH: I don't know what we can do...

ELLEN: I mean, in, in terms of, if, I guess what I always use a measure for myself, maybe, agree, disagree, I don't know, but, basically in that one room and in that bathroom, my spare, I can always hear noises.

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: I mean, that, that's a given but when I start to hear it in my living room, to me, at any time, that's when I feel it's too loud.

RICH: Right.

ELLEN: Um, and that's, you know, if I do call before that it's because I'm hearing it all through my whole house...

RICH: Right.

ELLEN: You know what I mean? And, probably some of that's as much a fact that I have French doors there...

RICH: Right.

ELLEN: ...and those aren't sealed so that's one of things that I want to address um, is maybe get, you know, stripping on there, because I think there's just no buffer, there's things I can do on my side

RICH: m'hmm.

ELLEN: ...to remedy some of this.

RICH: Well, I mean, I think, yeah, I uh, to the extent that normal conversation and everything is aggravating then I agree with you otherwise I, I just need to talk to people

ELLEN: Yeah.

RICH: ...and make sure there's better understanding of the fact that I own the place and I can't have neighbors really upset regardless of whatever...

ELLEN: It's a different kind of living situation in that regard I mean, it just is.

RICH: So, anyway, I've really got to get back to work here...

ELLEN: Yeah, I have some work to do.

RICH: Yeah, I have a lot going on but um...

ELLEN: ...but uh...

RICH: I appreciate your uh, bringin' it to attention.

ELLEN: No, I mean.

RICH: I'll try to deal with it...

ELLEN: I'm trying to express it as fairly (LAUGHS) as possible 'cause I think you're, you know, you've been such a great neighbor so far so I mean please don't misinterpret my, you know...

RICH: No, I know, I know what you're saying.

ELLEN: I, I... I need to cope with it somehow and, I don't know what else to do...

RICH: Yup, no, you shouldn't be unhappy with your situation so let me just try to work with it.

ELLEN: OK.

RICH: Alright?

ELLEN: Thanks, Rich.

RICH: Talk to you soon.

ELLEN: Bye.